Passion Draft..Live life and life to the FULLEST

My faith has not always been my passion. I was always raised in a Christian-Catholic environment from going to private school from kindergarten till eighth grade. Growing up a Catholic, it has instilled in me that Jesus is a part of my everyday life, that he forgives, and loves beyond all measure. But going to church every morning (as was required by my school) really did not help me to form as strong a bond to my faith. It was like I resented them for "pushing" us to attend. I felt forced. And the more you are forced to do something, the more you feel trapped, pushed, and resentful.




There was a period where I did not attend Church for a very long time. After going to a public school for the first time I felt liberated to make decisions for me based on what I wanted. But in that period I think I learned the biggest lesson of myself and my faith. I learned that I took my faith for granted. I was lost freshman year. Trying to find myself in a whole new world to me was difficult without the help of the Lord. I doubted God and especially my religion. But through all that, when I took a step into the ten o'clock Samoan mass I was reinvented. The beautiful voices, the faithful church-goers, and the feeling that the Lord was with me filled my heart and soul to the brim.


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I thought it could not get better than what I finally felt in my church; belonging and acceptance with myself and the Lord. I listened to the homilies (the reflection that the priest gives) so that I could get the most out of God's word and try to relate it to my life. It helped sometimes but it was really hard to stay focused and to really grasp everything. Until someone introduced me to a whole different way of worship.




In my research I attended an Easter play and several youth services at Word of Life Christian Center (WLCC) and was just amazed at the beautiful things that they were doing there. It was so modern and relatable, it moved me to tears! I felt so filled with understanding and love and passion that I haven't seen before in my church. They praise and worship so passionately that even the songs make you tear up. They fill you with the word of the Lord and help you to grasp the concept by using real world examples. I felt something rise within me that I never wanted to fall. I felt a true connection that I have tried so hard to achieve back in my Catholic faith. I interviewed Mrs. Canencia and she explains, "The main thing that we are to instill in others including the youth (the new generation) is that JESUS LOVES YOU no matter what. This is the most important thing that everyone Must know. Then it opens up to all the different challenges one has in their personal life and are to be guided this day forward." I have seen that they live by this concept and that Jesus gave us life and life to the FULLEST and it is what and how we choose to live our faith as good followers of the Lord.




What I learned is that it should not matter what religion you were born into whether it be Catholic, Christian, Mormon, or any other denomination; you should make that decision eventually for you. I learned that I get more out of the Word of Life community. I felt bad about this at first, I felt that I was betraying my fellow Catholics. But who says that any certain religion is the "Right" religion. It's what you get out of it and how you choose to use the knowledge that the Lord graces you with. The two religions are very different but in general we all follow one Lord and one Word that is the bible. But what they have in similar is that they try to instill in their followers the morals, values, and love of Jesus Christ. In a world filled with violence, hatred, and sin the main goal of the followers of the Lord is to love God, love others, love ourselves, and live a good life and life to the fullest.

Journal #32

Everyday is a memorable learning experience in or out of school. I learn the ways of relationships with family, friends, acquaintances, and the ways of society. Everything is a learning experience that will help me form my own judgements and views on certain matters. Its hard to pick but on major steping stone learning experience was getting behind the wheel. I learned that its not a game, people die, and you have to be responsible because your life and the life of others around you are not things to be taken lightly.
My vision of school is a learning atmosphere that reciprocates the want to better the students as a person and a student even if the student shows little interest. Because a school atmosphere where hostility and negative attitudes where the adult figures dont care, only makes it okay for the students to not care. We should not only learn the core classes but the ways of the outside world on our own. How to get a job, and develope our people skills. Learning it by experience is the only way things really sink in and the reality of it can affect you.

Journal #31

One passion that comes to mind when I think of the intrinsic rewards is reading. I love to read and for me it's a way to get away from the real world. It's a way for me to escape into anothers persons wolrd where their words give me strengh to and show me new things. I never liked reading until I read a certain book(Twilight). But my tastes have changed and the difficulty levels have changed also. It has come to the point where my punishments from my parents would to take my books away.HAHAHA. I think I'm a silent dork that likes to read when nothing else seems promising or just for the fun of it. I think because of my passion of reading I developed a passion of writing. I might like to write a book, work for a magazine, or become a journalist. I want to stretch by reading more difficult things on subjects that are informational and contraversial to broaden my knowledge and develope my own ideas of things. I hope to be a powerful writer where what I write can move people in one way or another, the way some writers moved me to tears,anger, or a deep sense of other feelings.

Communication: Her Proud Daughter

When I hear people say "communication is key to many a success in relationships in general," I can't help but feeling like a disbeliever, even pessimistic about it. I find myself saying in my head, "man what a whole bunch of self-righteous, optimistic, moralist people these are." They really believe that it's so simple that communication can mend a broken heart, or put back a broken relationship with friends or families? I mean it's just so easy to just not say anything at all. Its just like in World War II when the allies appeased everything that Hitler did to avoid conflict again. Wouldn't it be easier to turn your head from the wrong doings of others to spare the hurt all around? But we learn from our mistakes right? If we hold ourselves inwardly and let the "Hitler's" of our life step all over us, then we are turning to our own personal world war. And who know who will win that battle.

I'm a girl and of course it's in my nature to have the urge to talk to just hear myself or just the need to be heard. It's a lonely world when you can't share your joys and sadness with someone. But it's so hard to communicate with the two people who, by nature we try to hide everything for fear of disappointment or punishment. What teen openly goes to their mother to discuss the troubles of teenage crisis's? Personally, I fear ridicule and judgment.

But most would crave to have just a fraction of what my mother and I share. I can go to my mother and talk of these teenage "crisis's" that seemed to crush my whole world. But I open up willingly only to blow up at her because of her judgmental and blunt demeanor. My mother is not one to hold her tongue and say what you want to hear. I hear the wisdom in her words but it's said so candidly that I automatically put back up my walls. It's hard to accept the things that you try to block out that are pointed out to you from someone on the outside. It's a constant battle to be heard and to truly hear. But so much good has come out of our open communication that I can't help but being a true believer.

So I find myself openly sharing my troubles more and more as the years go by. My mother and I have not only the relationship of mother and daughter, but as friends too. It has helped build the trust and undying love for each other. I believe that if my mother never raised me the way she did, with all our healthy beefs, the open talk of friends, but the discipline of a mother, I would be far worse off. She is a proud mother, and I, her proud daughter. I believe in the powers of communication and crave for that openness in my future relations.

Poem Graphic

Journal #30

- degrading of other races:personally i have a step grandfather who is micronesian and there is so much racial prejudices and stereotypes against their race and I believe that things will change
- how sex complicates things and how open our society is to sex:personally many of my friends talk openly about sex and how its not a big deal.I dont believe its a big deal but it does complicate things and changes how a person thinks and feels.After your first time things in you change and everything is different.
- how religion affects ones beliefs:I am a frequent church goer and I love listening to the priest talk and relate the scriptures to our every day lives. I personally believe of the power of church.

Amber in Wonderland Final

Amber in Wonderland

In the silent nights
my dreams overwhelm the tossless slumber
while Mock turtles, Scared Bunnies, and a Mad Hatter
run amok in the mist between reality and dreams
while you try to decifer the difference

Sometimes waking to confusion
or happiness
or fear
or sadness
but having no sorrow
while all I can remeber is the turtle and his story
about his dilemmas and how we both,
can't seem to find who we were
and why we are who we are.

No longer able to control
wanting to let curiosity and a guiltless tounge loose.
Standing in the room
with the many locked doors
wanting to drink from the bottle or eat the cake too
To gain what I long for more than anything.

Because of curiosity
and a longing to be able to speak.
Speak to right the wrongs
Speak to defend myself
Speak to tell how I really feel
Refusing to hold my tounge any longer
To see me as I truly am
In all my glory.

We have met the enemy and he is us.

Fireworks:Friend or foe? Firworks should not be banned. Every year there is a push to ban fireworks in Hawaii. The many traditions of Hawaii include the ever famous and anticipated New Years or fourth of July were many fireworks are burned. Children running around with beautiful colors in their hands and crackling ones being thrown. Every year people are always sent to the hospital. Should they be banned just because of a few hospital cases?